Alison's Insights

Making Sense of Addiction Recovery in Midlife One Slow Deep Breath at a Time

Visiting the Doctor – Fact or Fiction

Before I got sober and re-established my relationship with food, I literally dreaded the idea of going to the doctor.

I’d make the appointment and immediately begin the negative build-up in my head.  I’d worry endlessly about what the nurse and/or doctor would ask about my eating habits (or lack thereof) after I stepped on the scale.  I’d lament about what their reaction would be after reviewing the paperwork spelling out my drinking habits.  Or shall I say, the fabricated version.

It would go something like this …

Do you drink?”   I’d answer “Yes” because I figure most people do.

About how many drinks to you consume in a week?”  Uh, no way was I answering that one honestly because honestly, I didn’t know the answer.

Do you drink every day?”  Hmmm, well, I suppose I could answer this one honestly but I know what’s coming next, and it’s a trick.

If yes, how many drinks do you consume a day?”  See, here it is … I know they’ll do the math.  I’m not dumb.

Bottom line is this, I’d lie through the whole thing.  Never once did I consider the reasons why a doctor has a patient answer these questions.  I only thought about how I would look on paper, how I’d be judged and whether I’d be assessed as “good” or “bad.”

Today I sat in a doctor’s waiting room filling out paperwork as I was a new patient.  I told the truth.  I answered every question honestly and thoroughly.  I truly WANTED this doctor to know everything, every single detail of my medical history.

Amazing what happens by taking my life to the brink of living.  I developed a major league appreciation for what an incredible machine my body is and how hard it worked to keep me alive.  I refuse to disrespect it any more.

As it turns out I have a herniated disk in my back.  The doctor advised what I needed to do in order to heal properly and, believe it or not, I’m going to do as I’m told.  I even went so far as to tell my sponsor what was said in order to keep myself accountable.  That alone will keep me in line with what the doctor ordered.

So now I’m home resting and actually feeling better.  I feel better because I was honest.   And in the end, it’s honesty that will continue to keep me healthy and alive.

Single Post Navigation

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: